


E is for Erin

by CobaltStargazer



Series: E is For... [1]
Category: Criminal Minds
Genre: F/F, Melancholy, Regret
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-22
Updated: 2014-06-22
Packaged: 2018-02-05 19:32:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 390
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1829644
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CobaltStargazer/pseuds/CobaltStargazer
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Alex Blake is moving on with her life after her resignation. But some things refuse to leave her alone.</p>
            </blockquote>





	E is for Erin

**Author's Note:**

> Bring some tissues for this one. I cried while I was writing it.

"Well. Here we are again.

You've been gone for over a year, and if there's a way to look down from heaven then I guess you know that I turned in my badge. They didn't have to take it away from me this time, I handed it over willingly. I knew this job was hard. That was never in doubt. But I didn't know _how_ hard, not really. You'd have thought I'd have figured it out when you died, but you know me, bull-headed to the last.

I went to your funeral with the others, watched them bury you, and no one knew why I was crying. I'm not sure I knew. What we had ended the day I was demoted, and I never looked at you that way again. But I grieved for you, Erin.

I was in love with you back then. I can say that now, admit what neither of us ever said. I was _so_ in love with you, and even though those feelings went away when you tossed me aside, I regret that I never got to tell you the truth once I came back. I regret that I was so angry and cold. Most of all, I regret that I didn't get to say goodbye.

James and I are going to take a long trip together, get to know each other again. Be a real couple, a real husband and wife. Whether you know it or not, you made me stronger. Maybe that was why I fell in love with you, because you were so strong. I don't know what's going to happen, and I'm a little scared. But I'm hopeful too, so that's positive. Maybe I'll come back here one day, let you know how it turned out. Hey, who knows, maybe you're keeping an eye on me. 

I miss you, Erin. I hope you're at peace. I loved you once, and the echoes of that love are still lingering. Maybe that's why I'm afraid, because I come here sometimes and just sit. It's morbid, but this has become a touchstone, and I don't know what will happen when I leave it behind.

In fact, I better go now. I won't say goodbye, but I will say so long. If you can see me, know that I'm okay. Mostly, anyway.

So long, Erin."


End file.
